The champagne and toast retirement home

The year is 2081 and I’m with my best friend in the lounge of the Champagne and Toast Seaview Retirement Home or Maison de Retraite as they call it here, on what’s left of the French Riviera.

We’ve been very lucky to get a spot.

But thanks to judicious financial advice, we’ve long-since leapt over the gender pension gap we read about in March 2021, and we’re having the time of our lives.

We’ve just had our afternoon-tea-in-a-pill, and next we’re planning our trip to Mars over a couple of glasses of fizz and some dried grasshoppers.

We’ve both had 3D printed livers fitted so it’s business as usual on the alcohol front (it turns out we needn’t have worried about the binge drinking after all).

We do miss chocolate though – that melt-in-the-mouth taste sensation that was last seen in 2056 – but we still enjoy the odd egg at Christmas!

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It took me a while to envisage what I’d be doing age 105. Apparently, this isn’t unusual. According to American planning guru Michael Kitces, we’re not very good at imagining a future that’s much apart from today’s reality.

Is this because we’re all incredibly dull and lacking imagination? Of course not! It’s Mother Nature priming us to think mainly about the present, so we’re prepped for all dangers.

But what about the danger of living until you’re 105 with no dosh?

You need to get prospects out of the now and onto their hoverboards to worry about that. How? By using IAP in your marketing:

• Identify the problem
• Agitate the problem
• Present your solution

Or the longer version, PPS (none of these acronyms are real by the way):

• Paint a picture of utopia: Wouldn’t it be great if you could feel/retire like this?
• Present the alternative: What’s the cost of not feeling/retiring like this?
• Show you’re the answer: I can help you avoid that cost and achieve that future

Et voila! You’ve helped people to see the unique value you provide, without going into an imaginary care home.

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